A Slight Glitch in My Plans

I'm off-track but only for a little while. I hope.

On the boardwalk at Oban, Scottish Highlands

My friends: I had planned to write the next chapter on my trip to the UK, but I’ve had a few setbacks and I wanted to let you know. I got back on September 20, and what I thought must be jetlag has turned into something more. I’ve had a relapse of Temporal Arteritis, an auto-immune disease that causes headaches, fatigue, loss of appetite, and more. It can be dangerous if it’s not brought under control, and I’ve had to fight to get an appointment with my doctor, having to go through the scheduler who couldn’t be convinced this was a bit of an emergency. She gave me an appointment three weeks hence and told me to go to the ER if it got worse. (!!) I slept on it and called again first thing in the morning. It took a bit of yelling, but suddenly, within minutes, she found that someone had ‘cancelled’ and I was able to be seen that very day.

I knew what had to happen and only my doctor—or any doctor—could make it happen. The simple though not always permanent cure is steroids. He had to prescribe them, and he did, but because I’m starting chemo in a week, he’s reluctant to give me a larger dose. It’s not enough, and the symptoms are still there. The exhaustion is often overwhelming and I’m fighting to keep as active as I can. The headaches keep me up at night. And of course, the fear.

Chemo. Again. Cancer in the remaining breast, but thankfully it appears to be a single contained tumor. I should be okay when it’s over, but it won’t be over until well into early next year. In the meantime, chemo. I’ll be sick. I’ll lose my hair. I’ll probably lose my sense of taste again. And if the chemo doesn’t destroy the tumor, it’ll require surgery.

And what if my insurance doesn’t cover it this time? What if Trump makes good his promise to destroy our health care system and make the insurance companies richer?

It stinks.

Still, I don’t want you to think I’m giving up. Perish the thought! But allow me this time to bitch. It won’t last. I always find something good in this old life, and that’s what I want to share.

Plus, I’m not done yet with that whole Trump thing.

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I got myself out two nights ago and found the most glorious sunset waiting for me. Totally unexpected. I couldn’t fully see it until I got down the path at the waterfront park and there it was.

These are the moments that sustain me. These are the moments that tell me I shouldn’t miss them. I honestly love my life when it isn’t throwing rocks at me.

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