Ramona, You do have the lovely memories of your loved ones. Yes, as we get older the losses do pile up, and I admire your resilience. You also do have so many people who read your posts and are inspired by them. I am one of them.
But I want you to know that we do not have "due process." You are too idealistic. I was that way. But the courts do not perform their lawful duty. I have witnessed how, as a vulnerable domestic violence victim, one is intimidated and threatened until one is silenced. Yes, court corruption and bias is real, "justice" goes to the highest bidder, and our court system becomes another forum for perpetuating abuse. I cannot tell you how painful and traumatic it is when one looks to our established institutions for help, and they do not work. This is part of my story.
Olya, I understand your reluctance to consider due process a tool. It has to be used in order to work. Of course. But it’s there and the tragedy is that it’s abused maybe more often than it’s used.
We have to keep reminding those who have the power that we expect them to honor their oaths by insisting due process be used. They know what it is. They know why it’s there. So far, they haven’t removed it. So we need to remind them every chance we get that their duty is to US.
I don’t know why that’s such a problem. We’ve seen what happens when those in power take the law into their own hands. The remedy is to remove them from power, not to allow them to grab more.
Ramona, You misunderstand me. I am not reluctant to use due process. I just saying that although we have due process, the reality is that many of our citizens are denied due process. It is no different than living in an authoritarian nation.
Yes, I agree. That’s why I write these pieces. As reminders that we need to use the powers we have—which, for many of us is simply awareness and the ability to share our stories in order to show the inconsistencies and the abuses.
We’re a community of victims, all of us in one way or another. We need to share those experiences in order to end the abuse. But first we have to know what tools are available, and due process is a great tool. I want it to be known that it’s available. Now we need to force its use.
Your skill at self-expression is simply grand, Mona. Glad you're such a survivor.
It is a difficult time for Americans not to feel powerless, when the president openly defies a determination by the Supreme Court, regardless of what is written where. It is a very great loss, indeed. May the momentum swing. ~J
Yes, Janice, openly defying the law is one thing; getting away with it is quite another. How long will this go on? Only as long as we stay polite about it.
Even without what's happening in this country and beyond, there is much to mourn. It seems the door to despondence is standing wide while the ones to encouragement are all but closed. Trying to see that encouragement is mostly courage.
Hugs for your aching heart, Mona, and thanks for your warrior cry!
It's going to take courage, Elizabeth, but that's nothing new for those of us who have lived long enough. Living a life takes courage. We have it inside, all of us. It takes energy, as well. The goal has to be something we're willing to fight for. I can't imagine a case where saving an entire country from this kind of evil wouldn't be energizing enough.
I think there will be a pushback, Ramona, I really do. There is already so much noise against what is happening, unless I'm only hearing one side of the "noise" way over here in Europe, or because of what I read on Substack, which is basically where I get my news from. It's mad, because my husband is a lawyer (well, he's retired now) and months ago, when I would mention how worried I was about what Trump might do, he would say there were too many guardrails in the US, and that his hands would be tied in so many respects. And even then I thought, hmm, I'm not sure you're right.
But I do believe in the pushback, in the mobilisation of the people against so much evil. xx
Francesca, I want to believe that this time the 'noise' will win it for us, but we've been down this road before. I think the noise must be sustained. Full time. We have to be loud and ever watchful. We can't let them get away with anything, no matter how much the press or the politicians would like us to ignore whatever it is this time. Uh uh, we have to be on it. Relentless. We have to make them pay...
You do. Relentless is the word. And I do worry for AOC and BS. I watched them the other day in LA. He is phenomenal. And I like her a lot. I know some don’t, but I like authenticity and drive. And she looks like my niece!
I'm glad to see both AOC and Bernie out there pushing for the people. I haven't always been a fan of either of them, but I'll give them this: They're out there! And they're making a difference. I hope their energy is contagious and other Dems catch it and take it to even greater heights.
If either or both of them emerge as leaders, I will follow. No question.
AOC has already emerged as a potential leader. As for Bernie, many people were drawn to his message during an earlier presidential race. It is interesting they have joined forces. Both are advocating for social justice.
I am the husband of the Kathy you mentioned in your current writing. I cried, but that’s ok. I need to cry. She was the love of my life, 54 years of marriage and 2 years of dating. She was one of a kind and loved me for what I am. I remember in the late 1960’s and early 1970’s protesting the Vietnam War with Kathy. We were of very like minds with regard to the Vietnam War and now our disgust of the current situation our country is in. I agree with every point you raised, Mona. I just don’t understand how humans, the same flesh and blood as me, can approve of what is changing in the USA. Assuming there is a God, how can that God approve of the ones who believe we are on the right path. We simply are not. Due process, like you said, is not being followed. And where is the social justice? If we, as a critical thinking people, don’t turn this ship around 180 degrees, we will become the Titanic.
Jim, thank you for taking time away from your own grieving to join us here. You and Kathy have always been my inspiration. (Old Hippies never die!) Kathy in particular went through so much pain long before this cancer diagnosis but she endured it, and even thrived, bringing such joy to so many, caring for so many others in every way. She was a marvel! And so are you. Carry on, dear cousin. We'll do this together! ❤️
“ now we can. Now we must. Now we will.” Yassss! I’m so with you.
Mona, I’m so sorry you’re grieving. I’m glad your sweet husband visits you in your dreams. And I’m grateful for your hope and your fight. You’re an inspiring woman.!
Ramona - your beautiful thoughts resonate with me in so many ways. I, too, lost my wonderful husband 7 years ago. My life will never be the same as well. Our love was special & once in a lifetime. Your grief about our country is the same for me. I keep hoping someone will save us. The days have become so surreal. The fear intense. I sat down & sobbed the other morning. I keep sounding the bell to friends who don’t know the half of what’s happening. We need to rise together to get our democracy back. I just pray we can do it.🙏
"I keep hoping someone will save us." Oh, me too! How could this happen a second time? How can we survive Trump this time? There are people with power who could save us but they're going to need more than a little nudge. They need to know we mean it when we insist they do their jobs. We can do that if we howl loud enough in numbers large enough. I'm energized by the protests and rallies, but I want to see our government officials find their courage and push back. They have the tools, they have the ammunition, they just need the balls...
Thanks, Ramona. This is my first time reading one of your posts. I especially loved, "I’d settle for the meaningful mundane, the extraordinary ordinary, a comfortable sameness, a recognition that this life, as we’ve known it, is worth saving. At the same time, I recognize that something caused the malignancy, and it needs to be addressed."
Thanks, Ramona, for this. I'm only 82, and I share your double grief for loved ones and country. I weep every day for both. Part of my way of dealing with such grief is to tell stories about my life experiences and those whom I've encountered and to comment on what's happening to us today. Be assured that I will save and share your post widely.
So nice to meet you, William. And thanks for your kind words. I've been over to "Elder Vibes" and I've subscribed. It's a great space and it's needed. I'll be back!
Beautiful essay, Ramona, so heartfelt in its sorrow, hope, and call-to-action.
This, I 100% agree with: "The pressure is on. No more grieving; not until that last breath. We can’t lose this one. Not when we know we can save it. The tragedy would be in knowing we could have saved it, but we didn’t do enough."
Grieve for the mourners indeed. May the energy fueling the grief transform to life affirming energy for our dying country.
I can only hope. ❤️
Ramona, You do have the lovely memories of your loved ones. Yes, as we get older the losses do pile up, and I admire your resilience. You also do have so many people who read your posts and are inspired by them. I am one of them.
But I want you to know that we do not have "due process." You are too idealistic. I was that way. But the courts do not perform their lawful duty. I have witnessed how, as a vulnerable domestic violence victim, one is intimidated and threatened until one is silenced. Yes, court corruption and bias is real, "justice" goes to the highest bidder, and our court system becomes another forum for perpetuating abuse. I cannot tell you how painful and traumatic it is when one looks to our established institutions for help, and they do not work. This is part of my story.
Olya, I understand your reluctance to consider due process a tool. It has to be used in order to work. Of course. But it’s there and the tragedy is that it’s abused maybe more often than it’s used.
We have to keep reminding those who have the power that we expect them to honor their oaths by insisting due process be used. They know what it is. They know why it’s there. So far, they haven’t removed it. So we need to remind them every chance we get that their duty is to US.
I don’t know why that’s such a problem. We’ve seen what happens when those in power take the law into their own hands. The remedy is to remove them from power, not to allow them to grab more.
Ramona, You misunderstand me. I am not reluctant to use due process. I just saying that although we have due process, the reality is that many of our citizens are denied due process. It is no different than living in an authoritarian nation.
Yes, I agree. That’s why I write these pieces. As reminders that we need to use the powers we have—which, for many of us is simply awareness and the ability to share our stories in order to show the inconsistencies and the abuses.
We’re a community of victims, all of us in one way or another. We need to share those experiences in order to end the abuse. But first we have to know what tools are available, and due process is a great tool. I want it to be known that it’s available. Now we need to force its use.
Your skill at self-expression is simply grand, Mona. Glad you're such a survivor.
It is a difficult time for Americans not to feel powerless, when the president openly defies a determination by the Supreme Court, regardless of what is written where. It is a very great loss, indeed. May the momentum swing. ~J
Yes, Janice, openly defying the law is one thing; getting away with it is quite another. How long will this go on? Only as long as we stay polite about it.
Even without what's happening in this country and beyond, there is much to mourn. It seems the door to despondence is standing wide while the ones to encouragement are all but closed. Trying to see that encouragement is mostly courage.
Hugs for your aching heart, Mona, and thanks for your warrior cry!
It's going to take courage, Elizabeth, but that's nothing new for those of us who have lived long enough. Living a life takes courage. We have it inside, all of us. It takes energy, as well. The goal has to be something we're willing to fight for. I can't imagine a case where saving an entire country from this kind of evil wouldn't be energizing enough.
I think there will be a pushback, Ramona, I really do. There is already so much noise against what is happening, unless I'm only hearing one side of the "noise" way over here in Europe, or because of what I read on Substack, which is basically where I get my news from. It's mad, because my husband is a lawyer (well, he's retired now) and months ago, when I would mention how worried I was about what Trump might do, he would say there were too many guardrails in the US, and that his hands would be tied in so many respects. And even then I thought, hmm, I'm not sure you're right.
But I do believe in the pushback, in the mobilisation of the people against so much evil. xx
Francesca, I want to believe that this time the 'noise' will win it for us, but we've been down this road before. I think the noise must be sustained. Full time. We have to be loud and ever watchful. We can't let them get away with anything, no matter how much the press or the politicians would like us to ignore whatever it is this time. Uh uh, we have to be on it. Relentless. We have to make them pay...
You do. Relentless is the word. And I do worry for AOC and BS. I watched them the other day in LA. He is phenomenal. And I like her a lot. I know some don’t, but I like authenticity and drive. And she looks like my niece!
I'm glad to see both AOC and Bernie out there pushing for the people. I haven't always been a fan of either of them, but I'll give them this: They're out there! And they're making a difference. I hope their energy is contagious and other Dems catch it and take it to even greater heights.
If either or both of them emerge as leaders, I will follow. No question.
AOC has already emerged as a potential leader. As for Bernie, many people were drawn to his message during an earlier presidential race. It is interesting they have joined forces. Both are advocating for social justice.
THIS! We have to scream at ALL the shit they 'flood the zone with'. ALL OF IT.
Amen
Beautiful words and thoughts, as usual. We all need to keep our humanity.
Yes! That’s a good way of putting it, Al.
I am the husband of the Kathy you mentioned in your current writing. I cried, but that’s ok. I need to cry. She was the love of my life, 54 years of marriage and 2 years of dating. She was one of a kind and loved me for what I am. I remember in the late 1960’s and early 1970’s protesting the Vietnam War with Kathy. We were of very like minds with regard to the Vietnam War and now our disgust of the current situation our country is in. I agree with every point you raised, Mona. I just don’t understand how humans, the same flesh and blood as me, can approve of what is changing in the USA. Assuming there is a God, how can that God approve of the ones who believe we are on the right path. We simply are not. Due process, like you said, is not being followed. And where is the social justice? If we, as a critical thinking people, don’t turn this ship around 180 degrees, we will become the Titanic.
Jim, thank you for taking time away from your own grieving to join us here. You and Kathy have always been my inspiration. (Old Hippies never die!) Kathy in particular went through so much pain long before this cancer diagnosis but she endured it, and even thrived, bringing such joy to so many, caring for so many others in every way. She was a marvel! And so are you. Carry on, dear cousin. We'll do this together! ❤️
Thank you dear lady. I stand next to you with all your subscribers
I love that you’re standing with me. I need this! 💕
“ now we can. Now we must. Now we will.” Yassss! I’m so with you.
Mona, I’m so sorry you’re grieving. I’m glad your sweet husband visits you in your dreams. And I’m grateful for your hope and your fight. You’re an inspiring woman.!
Holly, thank you for being my friend and ally. We WILL do this! ❤️
Thank you for growing up to be such an awesome human being! Thank you for sharing the wisdom of your years…tried, true, tested. Thank you❤️🩹
Thank you, Deb. I sometimes don’t feel like a grownup but I’m not sure that’s all bad! ❤️
Ramona - your beautiful thoughts resonate with me in so many ways. I, too, lost my wonderful husband 7 years ago. My life will never be the same as well. Our love was special & once in a lifetime. Your grief about our country is the same for me. I keep hoping someone will save us. The days have become so surreal. The fear intense. I sat down & sobbed the other morning. I keep sounding the bell to friends who don’t know the half of what’s happening. We need to rise together to get our democracy back. I just pray we can do it.🙏
"I keep hoping someone will save us." Oh, me too! How could this happen a second time? How can we survive Trump this time? There are people with power who could save us but they're going to need more than a little nudge. They need to know we mean it when we insist they do their jobs. We can do that if we howl loud enough in numbers large enough. I'm energized by the protests and rallies, but I want to see our government officials find their courage and push back. They have the tools, they have the ammunition, they just need the balls...
Thanks, Ramona. This is my first time reading one of your posts. I especially loved, "I’d settle for the meaningful mundane, the extraordinary ordinary, a comfortable sameness, a recognition that this life, as we’ve known it, is worth saving. At the same time, I recognize that something caused the malignancy, and it needs to be addressed."
Welcome, Laura! I hope you’ll come back and hang around again. ❤️
That would be lovely.
Thanks, Ramona, for this. I'm only 82, and I share your double grief for loved ones and country. I weep every day for both. Part of my way of dealing with such grief is to tell stories about my life experiences and those whom I've encountered and to comment on what's happening to us today. Be assured that I will save and share your post widely.
So nice to meet you, William. And thanks for your kind words. I've been over to "Elder Vibes" and I've subscribed. It's a great space and it's needed. I'll be back!
Beautiful essay, Ramona, so heartfelt in its sorrow, hope, and call-to-action.
This, I 100% agree with: "The pressure is on. No more grieving; not until that last breath. We can’t lose this one. Not when we know we can save it. The tragedy would be in knowing we could have saved it, but we didn’t do enough."
Thank you, Ramona.