I'm a long-time reproductive justice advocate and I'm sick (but not surprised) by this. After all, I live in Texas. These days, it feels like Texas is actively trying to kill us.
As a psychologist, I've had the privilege of listening to the stories of women who've had abortions and no one can understand the stakes until they hear them too. And it's not just about abortion. What will become of women who have miscarriages or molar pregnancies or whose babies die in the womb and need a D&C? What will become of the women forced to carry to term children they don't want? We already know where desperation will take them. I'm just heartsick, enraged, disgusted, and deeply, deeply despairing.
These yahoos spent their legislative session banning abortion, degrading democracy, forcing hospitals to admit visitors, and trying to ban mask mandates (thankfully, that one didn't get out of committee). Based on the 2018 election and beyond, I've already been convinced that Republicans are cheating at the ballot box (see the Beto/Cruz race as an example), so we're never going to get out of this at the state level. Our only hope is for 2 Democratic senators to come to their senses.
As for abortion, this has always been about control of women, nothing else. It's clear they care nothing about mothers and children already living their lives. I've been so upset since yesterday. I'm trying very hard to keep my sanity and not hate so many of my neighbors but it's tough. Very tough.
I know and I'm sorry. You're on the front lines, so I can imagine it's even worse for you and other women like you. Yet you persist. It's our strength, we women who have been fighting this forever--we won't give up. We come close sometimes, because it's so hard. So hard. But here we are talking about it, talking about our feelings and our hopes for the future.
Will this stand? I have to think not. At some point enough has to be enough. But where are the old feminist workhorses on this? Where is Gloria Steinem or Ellie Smeal or Cecile Richards? Where is Oprah? We need those emotional voices to remind the country of how far we've come and what it took. This turn is devastating and it requires some heartfelt analysis, and I'm not seeing it. Why?
I'm seeing more men than women commenting on it, and when they do they concentrate on the law and not on the human devastation. Women should be planning marches and working on punishments. Right now. Today. Are they?
That's a good point about not hearing from the prominent feminists. I don't know why they've been silent thus far. Others have not though. At least on Twitter, there was universal outrage.
I have a two-fold guess as to why women aren't planning marches, etc. My first theory is that we're tired. Mothers have been helping remote school kids for a year and now are battling school boards trying to implement mask mandates. Nursing is a profession that's largely comprised of women. So many are exhausted.
Second, women's issues always get short shrift. A lot of people have been galvanized by racial inequality within the last several years and they should. But women's issues always come last even though we're 52% of the population and cut across all demographics. Yet somehow our demands often go unheard. This is especially true in the south. So, here we are. Again.
I'm afraid you're right. Marches are not a priority right now. And really, how effective are they? I mean, there's the solidarity and the camaraderie and the feeling that we're actually doing something, but have they ever changed laws?
I believe the women's marches had a strong bearing on getting out the vote in both 2018 and 2020, but this is different. This is a legal standing, and any call to action would be peripheral. Would it change minds like voter marches do? Probably not.
I bet someone has done the research but I have no idea where to find it. I want to see research on which techniques really work to get out the vote. I read one study that showed door-to-door canvassing only works in very specific situations. When I have volunteered to work for a campaign I have usually felt like what I was doing was not making a difference.
I really want to know what I can do that is most likely to be effective. March? Show up at rallies in hopes of impressing the media? Donate? I have been decided to put my support mainly to get out the vote efforts but I would like to know which organizations are the most effective at this.
I don't know about anyone else, but unless congress acts and Biden signs off, I don't see what anyone else can do. Judges can only stall for so long. Roe v Wade has to become the law of the land.
I think feminists have been speaking out but the media just ignores them. I have heard a couple of good suggestions from Eli Mistal like this one he posted on Twitter:
“Thinking outside the box: Since there is no penalty, at all, for making false or frivolous claims under the Texas Bounty Hunting Act, and since people outside of Texas can sue anybody *in* Texas...
We could sue every single Republican in Texas for aiding or abetting abortions...”
On MSNBC he also said that we could federalize the employees at those clinics which would make it impossible to sue them.
Or we could pull a Larry Flynt and offer a reward for proof of any Republican leader who aided and abetted an abortion or, if female had one. That did Bob Barr of Ga and Robert Livingston of La in.
I loved it when Larry Flynt did that, but times are different now. The Republicans can get away with anything. They have no shame and congress has no balls. Neither does the press.
I bet if someone could prove that a Republican leader helped a woman get an abortion that might do it. Raping a woman doesn’t matter to the base but abortion just might. But the proof would have to be solid like it was in Barr’s case.
I saw what Elie Mystal said. That's kind of my point. It's only legit if it comes from men willing to come to the rescue.
His response is clever, of course, and fun to think about, but, again, there is no real coverage about the realities when this gross law is enacted. How will real women be impacted? What does it say to women when this decades-long battle comes to an end and we've lost? How will we recover from this and how long is it going to take?
We need to hear from women. We need to give them an equally powerful soapbox. It isn't that we don't appreciate the help from men, but how do WE gain that kind of power?
I am an older baby boomer and for years I only heard from women on this issue — people like the women who ran Planned Parenthood and feminist leaders like Gloria Steinem. Ordinary women on the other hand mostly kept silent.
My father was a physician who got his training during the Great Depression. He was a devout Catholic but thought that abortion should remain legal because he understood that he, like Biden, had no right to impose his personal religious beliefs on others. Also he had seen horrific results from illegal abortions.
I lived among women who didn't keep silent--neither did I--but none of us held public office or were judges, which meant we had no power.
The conversations were everywhere around the time of Roe v Wade, and thereafter. Ms Magazine, for example, was huge, and the articles were promoted everywhere. Women marched and threatened for decades, but in the end--which is now--the religion-based Pro-Life propaganda machine is winning. It's hard to combat "abortion is murder". When they'll even believe that sperm-meets-egg translates to viable life, there isn't much we can do to change their minds.
Was talking about the Texas mess with friends yesterday. All of us had wondered how anyone could know what procedure or treatment a woman has at a clinic without someone violating our HIPAA laws. We are constantly told by medical providers that there are strict privacy rules and made to sign documents saying we understand this. I haven’t heard anyone in the media talk about this.
They don't have to know; they only have to suspect and there are literally no consequences for being wrong. Some are considering suing the politicians who voted for this bill. I mean, why not?
I don't know if this is appropriate to link this here but I've written 3 different blog posts about abortion. This is the one I keep coming back to today, especially as my patients continue to tell me about their abortions and how I'm the only one, even years later, they've ever told. It's so tragic. https://drmistyhook.medium.com/stories-about-abortion-matter-ab4e9ad40d8d
I appreciate you're asking, and yes, by all means, feel free to share pieces you find pertinent! Any time! (And that goes for any of you.)
This is a wonderful piece, so thoughtful and full of good information, so now I'll ask you: I'd like to add it to the the piece I'm about to publish, again on abortion. I think it needs more eyes and it's a great companion to what I've written. Would that be okay?
Just read and then read aloud to my husband. My god, Mona, you have the most amazing ability to encapsulate - with just the right level of anger and frustration - every conversation we've ever had on this subject.
Thanks so much for reading it. I do hope my seething rage shows through, even if I don't say it outright! My fond hope is that this will end and I'll never have to talk about it again, but I know never to hold my breath waiting. If only...
I'm a long-time reproductive justice advocate and I'm sick (but not surprised) by this. After all, I live in Texas. These days, it feels like Texas is actively trying to kill us.
As a psychologist, I've had the privilege of listening to the stories of women who've had abortions and no one can understand the stakes until they hear them too. And it's not just about abortion. What will become of women who have miscarriages or molar pregnancies or whose babies die in the womb and need a D&C? What will become of the women forced to carry to term children they don't want? We already know where desperation will take them. I'm just heartsick, enraged, disgusted, and deeply, deeply despairing.
These yahoos spent their legislative session banning abortion, degrading democracy, forcing hospitals to admit visitors, and trying to ban mask mandates (thankfully, that one didn't get out of committee). Based on the 2018 election and beyond, I've already been convinced that Republicans are cheating at the ballot box (see the Beto/Cruz race as an example), so we're never going to get out of this at the state level. Our only hope is for 2 Democratic senators to come to their senses.
As for abortion, this has always been about control of women, nothing else. It's clear they care nothing about mothers and children already living their lives. I've been so upset since yesterday. I'm trying very hard to keep my sanity and not hate so many of my neighbors but it's tough. Very tough.
I know and I'm sorry. You're on the front lines, so I can imagine it's even worse for you and other women like you. Yet you persist. It's our strength, we women who have been fighting this forever--we won't give up. We come close sometimes, because it's so hard. So hard. But here we are talking about it, talking about our feelings and our hopes for the future.
Will this stand? I have to think not. At some point enough has to be enough. But where are the old feminist workhorses on this? Where is Gloria Steinem or Ellie Smeal or Cecile Richards? Where is Oprah? We need those emotional voices to remind the country of how far we've come and what it took. This turn is devastating and it requires some heartfelt analysis, and I'm not seeing it. Why?
I'm seeing more men than women commenting on it, and when they do they concentrate on the law and not on the human devastation. Women should be planning marches and working on punishments. Right now. Today. Are they?
That's a good point about not hearing from the prominent feminists. I don't know why they've been silent thus far. Others have not though. At least on Twitter, there was universal outrage.
I have a two-fold guess as to why women aren't planning marches, etc. My first theory is that we're tired. Mothers have been helping remote school kids for a year and now are battling school boards trying to implement mask mandates. Nursing is a profession that's largely comprised of women. So many are exhausted.
Second, women's issues always get short shrift. A lot of people have been galvanized by racial inequality within the last several years and they should. But women's issues always come last even though we're 52% of the population and cut across all demographics. Yet somehow our demands often go unheard. This is especially true in the south. So, here we are. Again.
I'm afraid you're right. Marches are not a priority right now. And really, how effective are they? I mean, there's the solidarity and the camaraderie and the feeling that we're actually doing something, but have they ever changed laws?
I believe the women's marches had a strong bearing on getting out the vote in both 2018 and 2020, but this is different. This is a legal standing, and any call to action would be peripheral. Would it change minds like voter marches do? Probably not.
So I don't know. Again, I don't know.
I bet someone has done the research but I have no idea where to find it. I want to see research on which techniques really work to get out the vote. I read one study that showed door-to-door canvassing only works in very specific situations. When I have volunteered to work for a campaign I have usually felt like what I was doing was not making a difference.
I really want to know what I can do that is most likely to be effective. March? Show up at rallies in hopes of impressing the media? Donate? I have been decided to put my support mainly to get out the vote efforts but I would like to know which organizations are the most effective at this.
I don't know about anyone else, but unless congress acts and Biden signs off, I don't see what anyone else can do. Judges can only stall for so long. Roe v Wade has to become the law of the land.
I think feminists have been speaking out but the media just ignores them. I have heard a couple of good suggestions from Eli Mistal like this one he posted on Twitter:
“Thinking outside the box: Since there is no penalty, at all, for making false or frivolous claims under the Texas Bounty Hunting Act, and since people outside of Texas can sue anybody *in* Texas...
We could sue every single Republican in Texas for aiding or abetting abortions...”
On MSNBC he also said that we could federalize the employees at those clinics which would make it impossible to sue them.
Or we could pull a Larry Flynt and offer a reward for proof of any Republican leader who aided and abetted an abortion or, if female had one. That did Bob Barr of Ga and Robert Livingston of La in.
I loved it when Larry Flynt did that, but times are different now. The Republicans can get away with anything. They have no shame and congress has no balls. Neither does the press.
I bet if someone could prove that a Republican leader helped a woman get an abortion that might do it. Raping a woman doesn’t matter to the base but abortion just might. But the proof would have to be solid like it was in Barr’s case.
I saw what Elie Mystal said. That's kind of my point. It's only legit if it comes from men willing to come to the rescue.
His response is clever, of course, and fun to think about, but, again, there is no real coverage about the realities when this gross law is enacted. How will real women be impacted? What does it say to women when this decades-long battle comes to an end and we've lost? How will we recover from this and how long is it going to take?
We need to hear from women. We need to give them an equally powerful soapbox. It isn't that we don't appreciate the help from men, but how do WE gain that kind of power?
I am an older baby boomer and for years I only heard from women on this issue — people like the women who ran Planned Parenthood and feminist leaders like Gloria Steinem. Ordinary women on the other hand mostly kept silent.
My father was a physician who got his training during the Great Depression. He was a devout Catholic but thought that abortion should remain legal because he understood that he, like Biden, had no right to impose his personal religious beliefs on others. Also he had seen horrific results from illegal abortions.
I lived among women who didn't keep silent--neither did I--but none of us held public office or were judges, which meant we had no power.
The conversations were everywhere around the time of Roe v Wade, and thereafter. Ms Magazine, for example, was huge, and the articles were promoted everywhere. Women marched and threatened for decades, but in the end--which is now--the religion-based Pro-Life propaganda machine is winning. It's hard to combat "abortion is murder". When they'll even believe that sperm-meets-egg translates to viable life, there isn't much we can do to change their minds.
Was talking about the Texas mess with friends yesterday. All of us had wondered how anyone could know what procedure or treatment a woman has at a clinic without someone violating our HIPAA laws. We are constantly told by medical providers that there are strict privacy rules and made to sign documents saying we understand this. I haven’t heard anyone in the media talk about this.
They don't have to know; they only have to suspect and there are literally no consequences for being wrong. Some are considering suing the politicians who voted for this bill. I mean, why not?
I don't know if this is appropriate to link this here but I've written 3 different blog posts about abortion. This is the one I keep coming back to today, especially as my patients continue to tell me about their abortions and how I'm the only one, even years later, they've ever told. It's so tragic. https://drmistyhook.medium.com/stories-about-abortion-matter-ab4e9ad40d8d
I appreciate you're asking, and yes, by all means, feel free to share pieces you find pertinent! Any time! (And that goes for any of you.)
This is a wonderful piece, so thoughtful and full of good information, so now I'll ask you: I'd like to add it to the the piece I'm about to publish, again on abortion. I think it needs more eyes and it's a great companion to what I've written. Would that be okay?
Absolutely! Thanks for asking.
Thanks so much! It'll be up tomorrow AM.
Just read and then read aloud to my husband. My god, Mona, you have the most amazing ability to encapsulate - with just the right level of anger and frustration - every conversation we've ever had on this subject.
Thanks so much for reading it. I do hope my seething rage shows through, even if I don't say it outright! My fond hope is that this will end and I'll never have to talk about it again, but I know never to hold my breath waiting. If only...