I am publishing an essay next week that I hope will give you a different way to look at it. Tl; dr - a malignant narcissist created an environment of narcissistic abuse, and everyone got caught up in it. It is okay to be angry. I am angry, too. But I am trying to focus my rage at the assholes who did this to all of us, and not people who were misguided. It's hard though. It's really, really hard.
I don't blame Democratic infighting. I blame the Republicans who lied over and over again about what they would do and the voters too lazy to do even minimal education. Now we wait two years while they trash the country and see it's bad enough for voters too change their minds. Yes, Democrats need to examine their own mistakes but most of it is on the voters.
I'm not ready. I'm still enraged and can't be around people yet. I went to the supermarket 3 days after the election and started crying as I walked through the aisles, feeling disoriented as I saw people doing something as mundane as grocery shopping, as if the world wasn't going to fall down around us. I don't understand how people are just going about their lives.
I think there has to be some change to the way some of our social media traps people in echo chambers. This is how "they" perpetuate false information, because the user never gets to see anything that challenges their entrenched worldview. This results in voters not having an accurate picture of who they're voting for. I don't see how we ever get through this moment in our history without finding some way to have a shared reality again.
After a few days of sobbing (it was like 2016 all over again, but worse) I’m finally getting my mental footing back a little. I’m forced to because my son is full blown maga and my daughter is a sympathizer (she swears they didn’t vote for him, but I think she’s secretly glad he won.)
I WILL NOT see them as the enemy. I will not allow that asshole to take my children from me. I just won’t.
So that forces me to try to understand where they are coming from. If I’m going to extend grace to them, I feel compelled to extend it to others.
That leaves me in an ethically gray area. But it also gives me an opportunity to consider we may not be completely innocent.
We’re vulnerable on immigration. I’m not sure what happened with so many people coming across the border. We travel a LOT, and nowhere do we see people coming into those countries w/o permission in nearly the numbers we have here. Yes, we had a lot going on, but if I don’t even understand what happened, I can’t fault the other side for not understanding. Trans athletes is another area where people feel pissed, and once again, it’s a complicated issue and it rubs my “fairness” side wrong. So again, if I’m uncomfortable…
That damn pendulum just won’t find middle ground.
Add to that the Israeli situation. I don’t know that anyone could have done a better job than Biden has done. We can’t FORCE our will on Bibi, and he was in 🍊💩 pocket. Had we told Israel to suck it, we would have lost people, too. As it is, those who protest voted probably cost us the election, and they are in the FO stage of FAFO. We warned them and they didn’t listen.
And don’t even get me started on Democratic men, and even women, who largely kept quiet, but weren’t going to vote for a black woman come hell or high water.
Why all of them couldn’t suck it up and vote to save the country in spite of their issues is beyond me. I suspect many are sorry now and wish they could have their vote back, but we’ll never know if it was enough to have made a difference.
The media is also partially to blame. They rolled over and refused to tell the truth about 🍊💩. I don’t believe it was our messaging, but their unwillingness to deliver it.
I don’t know if the country will survive this or not. There are small glimmers of hope. But we aren’t like them in many respects. We won’t play dirty, as much as I wish we would sometimes. I loved Kamala’s hopeful, joyful approach. That’s who we WANT to be. And if that means we can’t win, then I guess we deserve the country we’ll get. We’re NOT who we thought we were. The founders gave us our Republic, now we see if we can keep it. We’ve come dangerously close to losing it, and we may still.
I’ve obviously got a lot more thinking to do, but that’s where I am today, a week out.
Ah, Janet, I feel for you. My own brother is a bothsideser, playing games with my anger and grief by telling me nothing bad is going to happen and I’m just being a drama queen. And that the Democrats are as bad or worse. It’s baffling and frustrating. He grew up in the same blue collar liberal household as I did, though 13 years separate us. I was out of the house by the time he was five so I had no influence over him! The rest of my family, nuclear and otherwise, are with me.
There is no argument here that the Democrats should have done more when they held power. On the border, I tend to want our government to give sanctuary when it’s needed. They’re not totally at fault for the influx, since they send many more of them back than they allow in. That message seems to be loud and clear, and still they make the attempt. There has to be a way to honor and protect refugees.
Every issue has its complications and I don’t feel I have a handle on any of them. Especially Israel. I have NO idea how to fix that one, or what the Biden administration is doing right or wrong. I stay out of it. The same with trans athletes. Out of my depth.
But trying to maintain relationships with those who are working with the other side to put an end to our democracy is a tougher issue. That pain is personal. I can only hope the damage from Trump isn’t so great we’re permanently torn apart.
Where the rub comes in is that they see US as the ones who are thwarting democracy, supposedly shoving our liberal social issues down their throats, and creating situations where Russia and China see us as weak, vs. 🍊💩 who they can’t quite figure out and are supposedly afraid to find out how much of what he threatens is real. And of course they’ll never admit they’ve been mislead/lied to by their media outlets.
When my son and I talk politics (which we can now do without chewing each other’s heads off) we CAN find some common ground. We’ll never completely see eye to eye, but when was that ever the case? We just need to reach a point where we cease to see each other as the enemy, and start relating as Americans again. Maybe that’s the Pollyanna in me talking, but I see no other way. Neither side can subjugate the other and still be America.
I'll never understand how caring about other people is considered weak, but I do understand the propaganda behind it: The powerful need to dehumanize their victims. Can't have us do-gooders trying to protect them.
I'm not ready to forgive those who either voted for Trump or opened the door for him. Too many years of having to step aside and let the right wing have their way, knowing they're going to ruin much of our hard work. They're going to have to show some heart before I'll back down.
I don't know how long my recovery will take, but yesterday, without warning I received 7 text messages calling me all kinds of names people use to degrade women because of my work with the campaign. I was stunned, but not altogether surprised. After all, Hate won the election and Hate will continue to intimidate those they believe are less powerful. But , I'm not giving in. I wanted to post the phone numbers on Facebook, but my husband, my warrior, said to give it a few days. We called our cell phone provider and was told to contact the police. For now I've block the numbers and saved the text messages. I read your post, but I'm still not sure I want to be a part of a system that focuses on Hate. I love my country and I want to live in a place that harbors love, safety, and equality for all creatures. I suppose it will have to start with me, but I don't have the patience to deal with Hate, however subtle, and yes, Hate can be nuanced--apathy kept millions from voting which meant they hate enough to not care about you and me. I'm still grieving, but fighting back a little at a time.
Some parts of some days I still cry. For what could have been. The joy, the rule of law, the protection of women’s health, the possibility of worldwide stability with our NATO allies, the respect for our military service people and their families, the continued growth of our economy. I could go on but right now I cannot. The loss overwhelms me.
I’m trying not to slice and dice and find someone to blame for the Harris/Walz campaign, which I truly think was incredible.
If/when I’m in a pissed off angry mood, I look at the years long push by the R or Magas (with billionaire funding) to build a DEEP, EXPANSIVE, powerful bullhorn of outrageous lies. Always right on message top down, always consistent, always to incite hate of the “other” and someone to blame. Utilizing every psychological trick in the book effectively. Our basic methods of engaging people and building community cannot compete. So far.
But change comes.
And if I focus on those I respect and ignore the crazy carnival, I can begin to see the seeds of brilliant, ethical, resilient, leaders and communities that can build a 24/7/365 Outreach Network. We cannot expect to “win” when we just appear every 2 years.
I’m starting to believe the freedom of the internet is our only salvation. We can no longer depend on corporate media to keep it real and disseminate the truth, so we’ll have to do it ourselves. I didn’t think it would be possible but it’s coming together.
Some very smart people are figuring out who to trust and how to get the word out. As it comes together, Seth Abramson and others will be adding names to lists of trusted sources.
Bluesky is the new gathering place, building by the millions as liberals and progressives abandon Twitter/X. It’s only one sign that the resistance is active and looking for new recruits.
I struggle with this too. Feels like we're trying to have a calm, fact-based, reasonable discussion with people intent on screeching, throwing their poop and trying to set the curtains on fire. Feels like we've been in this situation (albeit lighter) with poop flinging Republicans since Ronald Reagan. They're only interested in domination - not coexistence. So how to respond? Here I think back to LGBTQ history: for decades politics and religion absolutely refused to even consider that LGBTQ people were human. For many we existed in the "evil other" category that only deserved to be dominated/crushed. We LGBTQ people had to remind people in our personal lives that we were still their children, their friends, their coworkers - just as we were *before* they learned of our sexuality. We had to help people who openly hated us to remember the values of peace, of coexistence, of mutual respect... we had to remind rigid people of the value in adjusting thinking when presented with new information. We had to demonstrate the values within yielding to reality, the fact-based world, to recognizing variations within humanity. I think we're here again... needing to coach simplistic-minded group-think mobs of people on how to deal with uncertainty and complexity in reality without needing to reflexively squash and dominate everything that's different or doesn't fit neatly within some simple sound-bite virtue-signalling slogan.
As yet I'm not able to have compassion for the current poop throwing idiots. I'm not yet willing to clean up their mess (again) for them. Whenever the trump voters complain in the future I'm ready to say "this trouble was brought to you by voting for trump - so enjoy it assh**e". Which wouldn't help. Currently I'm just focusing on giving my democracy-advocating friends love and support. Best I can do just now.
I've been feeling so much anger, but mostly, disappointment. Disappointment in white women who voted for Trump and even more so, disappointment in voters who stayed home this time. How could voting for a man with no moral character be a better choice, no matter what eggs cost? I'm flabbergasted it was so easy for so many to turn a blind eye. It feels like my values have been trampled on.
Disinformation won. That's our real enemy. Not Trump voters, but disinformation and lies. Dems need to figure out how to deal with that.
Since the election, I've been swinging wildly between fury and despondency. I think I'm slowly settling into disappointment and determination, but that takes time.
I'm mostly furious that our mainstream media has become a cesspool of spin and misinformation, and that a huge number of voters apparently put zero thought into what they were voting for (I don't understand why someone who avoids news bothers to vote at all). I've been hearing that Google searches for "How do tariffs work" and "Can I change my vote" skyrocketed AFTER the election. :facepalm:
I'm also furious about the finger-pointing. Harris & Walz ran an amazing campaign; they don't deserve the blame. Yes, Democrats need to figure out how to reach voters, and I'd venture that the message needs to focus more on wages and cost of living instead of saving democracy writ large--because the latter is a higher level concept that doesn't resonate with people who are struggling to get by (and who, in many cases, read at no more than a 6th grade level).
For now, I'm focusing on a few bright spots: wins at the state and local levels, Senate Rs choosing Thune over Scott as majority leader, 47 poaching his own congressional majorities to fill his cabinet, and any opportunities to help the misguided do better next time (note that I'm only sympathetic, and barely so, with people who didn't take the time to know better--voters who embrace the hate get nothing from me).
There's work to do if we're going to fight the lies and come out on the other side of this. I don't know what that looks like yet, but I'm doing what I can to participate in community here and over at Bluesky.
Ramona, this and the prior article, Can I Really Stop Caring, are the literary version of Strumming My Pain With Her Fingers for me lately.
You've told my life experience over this past week of pain, regret, fear, despair and disappointment over the defeat of one of the best qualified presidential candidates in my lifetime by a disgusting convict and sex predator. I vacillate between withdrawing like a hermit and thinking of working with allies to foment a nationwide riot in response. Some sensible middle between those exists; let's all work together to find it. Thanks again for a beautifully written piece.
Such powerful words, I feel them in my soul. I'm in a place of powerlessness and I've accepted it for now. It's actually a relief. I'm not up for another 4 years of court cases and law-breaking. So many people behaving badly with Trump on their side. They can all have each other. Reality will prevail and the truth will come out- it always does. I'll focus my energy where I can be of service.
Thank you for putting to words so eloquently what so many of us are experiencing. Have spent the past 9 days cycling up and down, back and forth through the 5 stages of grief. Denial, depression, anger, bargaining, anger, depression, bargaining, denial with lots of despair, disappointment, anxiety and fear thrown in. Haven't found acceptance yet and can't imagine how I ever will.
We haven't gone out to dinner since the night of the election when my partner and a good friend and I toasted Kamala and a blue tide of victories we hoped we'd return home to that evening. Have forced myself to eat food over the past week while my stomach tied in knots. Did not go out in public for a week until yesterday when I went to a yoga class with people I knew and later attended a book group meeting, again with a small group of like-minded women.
Wake up in the middle of the night in a panic every night but two days ago started reading poetry by Mary Oliver and listening to guided meditations on the Insight Timer app. Both help immensely. Taking lots of calming herbal tinctures and drinking herbal teas to keep anxiety from overwhelming me. It helps.
Unfriended everyone on facebook who I knew or suspected to be a supporter of the career criminal. Deactivated my Twitter account. Shared something for the first time to facebook today that I found uplifting, which generated a lot of responses of people who've been suffering in silence. We need to come out and find our community again.
Today I watched 6 cardinals-4 bright red males and 2 beautiful females foraging in the leaves on our deck-all peacefully coexisting with the backdrop of burning bushes, their crimson leaves glowing on a rainy Thursday. Felt pure joy for the first time. Finding my footing again, one day at a time.
I am publishing an essay next week that I hope will give you a different way to look at it. Tl; dr - a malignant narcissist created an environment of narcissistic abuse, and everyone got caught up in it. It is okay to be angry. I am angry, too. But I am trying to focus my rage at the assholes who did this to all of us, and not people who were misguided. It's hard though. It's really, really hard.
I don't blame Democratic infighting. I blame the Republicans who lied over and over again about what they would do and the voters too lazy to do even minimal education. Now we wait two years while they trash the country and see it's bad enough for voters too change their minds. Yes, Democrats need to examine their own mistakes but most of it is on the voters.
As frightening as 45 is what if he doesn't survive? J. D. us an equally nightmarish person.
It's weird that nobody is talking about JD Vance since the election. I haven't heard his name mentioned. Have you?
I'm not ready. I'm still enraged and can't be around people yet. I went to the supermarket 3 days after the election and started crying as I walked through the aisles, feeling disoriented as I saw people doing something as mundane as grocery shopping, as if the world wasn't going to fall down around us. I don't understand how people are just going about their lives.
I think there has to be some change to the way some of our social media traps people in echo chambers. This is how "they" perpetuate false information, because the user never gets to see anything that challenges their entrenched worldview. This results in voters not having an accurate picture of who they're voting for. I don't see how we ever get through this moment in our history without finding some way to have a shared reality again.
I’m with you on all of this. Thank you for saying it out loud.
After a few days of sobbing (it was like 2016 all over again, but worse) I’m finally getting my mental footing back a little. I’m forced to because my son is full blown maga and my daughter is a sympathizer (she swears they didn’t vote for him, but I think she’s secretly glad he won.)
I WILL NOT see them as the enemy. I will not allow that asshole to take my children from me. I just won’t.
So that forces me to try to understand where they are coming from. If I’m going to extend grace to them, I feel compelled to extend it to others.
That leaves me in an ethically gray area. But it also gives me an opportunity to consider we may not be completely innocent.
We’re vulnerable on immigration. I’m not sure what happened with so many people coming across the border. We travel a LOT, and nowhere do we see people coming into those countries w/o permission in nearly the numbers we have here. Yes, we had a lot going on, but if I don’t even understand what happened, I can’t fault the other side for not understanding. Trans athletes is another area where people feel pissed, and once again, it’s a complicated issue and it rubs my “fairness” side wrong. So again, if I’m uncomfortable…
That damn pendulum just won’t find middle ground.
Add to that the Israeli situation. I don’t know that anyone could have done a better job than Biden has done. We can’t FORCE our will on Bibi, and he was in 🍊💩 pocket. Had we told Israel to suck it, we would have lost people, too. As it is, those who protest voted probably cost us the election, and they are in the FO stage of FAFO. We warned them and they didn’t listen.
And don’t even get me started on Democratic men, and even women, who largely kept quiet, but weren’t going to vote for a black woman come hell or high water.
Why all of them couldn’t suck it up and vote to save the country in spite of their issues is beyond me. I suspect many are sorry now and wish they could have their vote back, but we’ll never know if it was enough to have made a difference.
The media is also partially to blame. They rolled over and refused to tell the truth about 🍊💩. I don’t believe it was our messaging, but their unwillingness to deliver it.
I don’t know if the country will survive this or not. There are small glimmers of hope. But we aren’t like them in many respects. We won’t play dirty, as much as I wish we would sometimes. I loved Kamala’s hopeful, joyful approach. That’s who we WANT to be. And if that means we can’t win, then I guess we deserve the country we’ll get. We’re NOT who we thought we were. The founders gave us our Republic, now we see if we can keep it. We’ve come dangerously close to losing it, and we may still.
I’ve obviously got a lot more thinking to do, but that’s where I am today, a week out.
Ah, Janet, I feel for you. My own brother is a bothsideser, playing games with my anger and grief by telling me nothing bad is going to happen and I’m just being a drama queen. And that the Democrats are as bad or worse. It’s baffling and frustrating. He grew up in the same blue collar liberal household as I did, though 13 years separate us. I was out of the house by the time he was five so I had no influence over him! The rest of my family, nuclear and otherwise, are with me.
There is no argument here that the Democrats should have done more when they held power. On the border, I tend to want our government to give sanctuary when it’s needed. They’re not totally at fault for the influx, since they send many more of them back than they allow in. That message seems to be loud and clear, and still they make the attempt. There has to be a way to honor and protect refugees.
Every issue has its complications and I don’t feel I have a handle on any of them. Especially Israel. I have NO idea how to fix that one, or what the Biden administration is doing right or wrong. I stay out of it. The same with trans athletes. Out of my depth.
But trying to maintain relationships with those who are working with the other side to put an end to our democracy is a tougher issue. That pain is personal. I can only hope the damage from Trump isn’t so great we’re permanently torn apart.
So much to worry about. Thanks for your thoughts.
Where the rub comes in is that they see US as the ones who are thwarting democracy, supposedly shoving our liberal social issues down their throats, and creating situations where Russia and China see us as weak, vs. 🍊💩 who they can’t quite figure out and are supposedly afraid to find out how much of what he threatens is real. And of course they’ll never admit they’ve been mislead/lied to by their media outlets.
When my son and I talk politics (which we can now do without chewing each other’s heads off) we CAN find some common ground. We’ll never completely see eye to eye, but when was that ever the case? We just need to reach a point where we cease to see each other as the enemy, and start relating as Americans again. Maybe that’s the Pollyanna in me talking, but I see no other way. Neither side can subjugate the other and still be America.
I'll never understand how caring about other people is considered weak, but I do understand the propaganda behind it: The powerful need to dehumanize their victims. Can't have us do-gooders trying to protect them.
I'm not ready to forgive those who either voted for Trump or opened the door for him. Too many years of having to step aside and let the right wing have their way, knowing they're going to ruin much of our hard work. They're going to have to show some heart before I'll back down.
I don't know how long my recovery will take, but yesterday, without warning I received 7 text messages calling me all kinds of names people use to degrade women because of my work with the campaign. I was stunned, but not altogether surprised. After all, Hate won the election and Hate will continue to intimidate those they believe are less powerful. But , I'm not giving in. I wanted to post the phone numbers on Facebook, but my husband, my warrior, said to give it a few days. We called our cell phone provider and was told to contact the police. For now I've block the numbers and saved the text messages. I read your post, but I'm still not sure I want to be a part of a system that focuses on Hate. I love my country and I want to live in a place that harbors love, safety, and equality for all creatures. I suppose it will have to start with me, but I don't have the patience to deal with Hate, however subtle, and yes, Hate can be nuanced--apathy kept millions from voting which meant they hate enough to not care about you and me. I'm still grieving, but fighting back a little at a time.
Ramona,
Some parts of some days I still cry. For what could have been. The joy, the rule of law, the protection of women’s health, the possibility of worldwide stability with our NATO allies, the respect for our military service people and their families, the continued growth of our economy. I could go on but right now I cannot. The loss overwhelms me.
I’m trying not to slice and dice and find someone to blame for the Harris/Walz campaign, which I truly think was incredible.
If/when I’m in a pissed off angry mood, I look at the years long push by the R or Magas (with billionaire funding) to build a DEEP, EXPANSIVE, powerful bullhorn of outrageous lies. Always right on message top down, always consistent, always to incite hate of the “other” and someone to blame. Utilizing every psychological trick in the book effectively. Our basic methods of engaging people and building community cannot compete. So far.
But change comes.
And if I focus on those I respect and ignore the crazy carnival, I can begin to see the seeds of brilliant, ethical, resilient, leaders and communities that can build a 24/7/365 Outreach Network. We cannot expect to “win” when we just appear every 2 years.
I’m game if you are. With much respect. 💙🇺🇸
I’m starting to believe the freedom of the internet is our only salvation. We can no longer depend on corporate media to keep it real and disseminate the truth, so we’ll have to do it ourselves. I didn’t think it would be possible but it’s coming together.
Some very smart people are figuring out who to trust and how to get the word out. As it comes together, Seth Abramson and others will be adding names to lists of trusted sources.
Bluesky is the new gathering place, building by the millions as liberals and progressives abandon Twitter/X. It’s only one sign that the resistance is active and looking for new recruits.
I struggle with this too. Feels like we're trying to have a calm, fact-based, reasonable discussion with people intent on screeching, throwing their poop and trying to set the curtains on fire. Feels like we've been in this situation (albeit lighter) with poop flinging Republicans since Ronald Reagan. They're only interested in domination - not coexistence. So how to respond? Here I think back to LGBTQ history: for decades politics and religion absolutely refused to even consider that LGBTQ people were human. For many we existed in the "evil other" category that only deserved to be dominated/crushed. We LGBTQ people had to remind people in our personal lives that we were still their children, their friends, their coworkers - just as we were *before* they learned of our sexuality. We had to help people who openly hated us to remember the values of peace, of coexistence, of mutual respect... we had to remind rigid people of the value in adjusting thinking when presented with new information. We had to demonstrate the values within yielding to reality, the fact-based world, to recognizing variations within humanity. I think we're here again... needing to coach simplistic-minded group-think mobs of people on how to deal with uncertainty and complexity in reality without needing to reflexively squash and dominate everything that's different or doesn't fit neatly within some simple sound-bite virtue-signalling slogan.
As yet I'm not able to have compassion for the current poop throwing idiots. I'm not yet willing to clean up their mess (again) for them. Whenever the trump voters complain in the future I'm ready to say "this trouble was brought to you by voting for trump - so enjoy it assh**e". Which wouldn't help. Currently I'm just focusing on giving my democracy-advocating friends love and support. Best I can do just now.
Hi Ramona,
I've been feeling so much anger, but mostly, disappointment. Disappointment in white women who voted for Trump and even more so, disappointment in voters who stayed home this time. How could voting for a man with no moral character be a better choice, no matter what eggs cost? I'm flabbergasted it was so easy for so many to turn a blind eye. It feels like my values have been trampled on.
Disinformation won. That's our real enemy. Not Trump voters, but disinformation and lies. Dems need to figure out how to deal with that.
Thank you for writing this. It speaks to me.
Since the election, I've been swinging wildly between fury and despondency. I think I'm slowly settling into disappointment and determination, but that takes time.
I'm mostly furious that our mainstream media has become a cesspool of spin and misinformation, and that a huge number of voters apparently put zero thought into what they were voting for (I don't understand why someone who avoids news bothers to vote at all). I've been hearing that Google searches for "How do tariffs work" and "Can I change my vote" skyrocketed AFTER the election. :facepalm:
I'm also furious about the finger-pointing. Harris & Walz ran an amazing campaign; they don't deserve the blame. Yes, Democrats need to figure out how to reach voters, and I'd venture that the message needs to focus more on wages and cost of living instead of saving democracy writ large--because the latter is a higher level concept that doesn't resonate with people who are struggling to get by (and who, in many cases, read at no more than a 6th grade level).
For now, I'm focusing on a few bright spots: wins at the state and local levels, Senate Rs choosing Thune over Scott as majority leader, 47 poaching his own congressional majorities to fill his cabinet, and any opportunities to help the misguided do better next time (note that I'm only sympathetic, and barely so, with people who didn't take the time to know better--voters who embrace the hate get nothing from me).
There's work to do if we're going to fight the lies and come out on the other side of this. I don't know what that looks like yet, but I'm doing what I can to participate in community here and over at Bluesky.
Ramona, this and the prior article, Can I Really Stop Caring, are the literary version of Strumming My Pain With Her Fingers for me lately.
You've told my life experience over this past week of pain, regret, fear, despair and disappointment over the defeat of one of the best qualified presidential candidates in my lifetime by a disgusting convict and sex predator. I vacillate between withdrawing like a hermit and thinking of working with allies to foment a nationwide riot in response. Some sensible middle between those exists; let's all work together to find it. Thanks again for a beautifully written piece.
Such powerful words, I feel them in my soul. I'm in a place of powerlessness and I've accepted it for now. It's actually a relief. I'm not up for another 4 years of court cases and law-breaking. So many people behaving badly with Trump on their side. They can all have each other. Reality will prevail and the truth will come out- it always does. I'll focus my energy where I can be of service.
Thank you for putting to words so eloquently what so many of us are experiencing. Have spent the past 9 days cycling up and down, back and forth through the 5 stages of grief. Denial, depression, anger, bargaining, anger, depression, bargaining, denial with lots of despair, disappointment, anxiety and fear thrown in. Haven't found acceptance yet and can't imagine how I ever will.
We haven't gone out to dinner since the night of the election when my partner and a good friend and I toasted Kamala and a blue tide of victories we hoped we'd return home to that evening. Have forced myself to eat food over the past week while my stomach tied in knots. Did not go out in public for a week until yesterday when I went to a yoga class with people I knew and later attended a book group meeting, again with a small group of like-minded women.
Wake up in the middle of the night in a panic every night but two days ago started reading poetry by Mary Oliver and listening to guided meditations on the Insight Timer app. Both help immensely. Taking lots of calming herbal tinctures and drinking herbal teas to keep anxiety from overwhelming me. It helps.
Unfriended everyone on facebook who I knew or suspected to be a supporter of the career criminal. Deactivated my Twitter account. Shared something for the first time to facebook today that I found uplifting, which generated a lot of responses of people who've been suffering in silence. We need to come out and find our community again.
Today I watched 6 cardinals-4 bright red males and 2 beautiful females foraging in the leaves on our deck-all peacefully coexisting with the backdrop of burning bushes, their crimson leaves glowing on a rainy Thursday. Felt pure joy for the first time. Finding my footing again, one day at a time.